Loneliness is a subjective experience where someone feels unnoticed, alone, worthless, unloved and feeling disconnected from the surrounding environment. Julianne Holt-Lunstad, a researcher from Brigham Young University, said that feeling lonely is a problem that requires serious attention because it can affect one’s physical and mental health.
If you have ever felt lonely, you will surely find your life suddenly boring, you stay away from the environment, refuse to hang out with friends or boyfriends, are not passionate about your activities and are more prone to negative thinking.
So why do we feel this sense of loneliness? What are some factors that cause a person to feel lonely and is there a way to overcome them?
Feelings of loneliness tend to increase when in aging. Pinquart and Sorensen in their 2001 study explained that someone who was around 70 years old reported feeling lonely more often than individuals who were in their 20s. At this time, a person experiences a phase of losing loved ones (parents and spouse) due to death and separation from children and relatives who no longer live on the same roof with them.
For those of you who still have parents, be diligent to invite them to chat and occasional vacation together out of town. If you have to stay far away from them because they are married or are migrating to work, contact them regularly. Sometimes, they just need to be heard so they are not quiet.
Switching place frequently
For those of you who move around a lot because of work or because you follow parents who are reassigned, the article doesn’t have much time to establish more intimate relationships with other people. Not infrequently you also complain because it is rather difficult to find a partner.
To avoid loneliness, you can use technology to contact old friends whether via BBM, Whatsapp, Skype, Line or email. Now, technological advances connect the far away so that it feels close.
Lack of Self-Esteem
For those of you who consider yourself less valuable you tend to feel very uncomfortable when faced with social situations, right? For you dealing with people and a crowded environment is a risky situation that you often avoid. Such people are rather rigid and slow in their process of social interaction, passive and lack the courage to express themselves and their opinions. To not feel lonely, you need to practice expressing yourself at least take the time to talk in front of the mirror every day.
If you are not the type of person who likes to talk a lot, try to establish relationships while expressing yourself through social networks. For example, by creating a blog and then writing your story in it. You can use that to practice your social skills by diligently blogging walking and giving each other feedback about each other’s writing. If you have the courage to express yourself, have a meeting with your fellow writers or blog friends.
Changed marital status
The absence of a spouse or loss of marital status due to divorce can lead to negative emotions. At the beginning of the adjustment to divorce, someone will feel lonely because everything is doing it alone. Divorced women tend to be more able to survive in solitude especially those who already have children, women tend to prioritize the interests of children rather than personal desires while most men choose to remarry not long after the divorce.
Long-distance relationship also triggers feelings of loneliness. LDR principals often feel that communication decreases because they are busy with their own routines. Feeling homesickness and the lack of intensity of meeting with a partner also makes a person more easily agitated.
To avoid getting lonely, take time to please yourself and realize your dreams. Couples are important but that does not mean loneliness that hit it actually inhibits you from reaching your goals. Every now and then if you have time, on vacation, take time to visit each other. If it’s love, distance doesn’t mean anything, right?
Mood Changing Conditions Can Make Feel Lonely
The VanderWeele, Hawkley, Thisted and Cacioppo study found 229 people with middle adulthood experienced loneliness year after year and loneliness that was not handled properly would lead to depressive disorders. If you include people who are moody, beware if you feel lonely and overcome as soon as possible. If the loneliness that you feel continues, it never hurts to consult a psychiatrist or psychologist to get the right treatment.